Scratch that

Now that the real world distractions of 2014 are out of the way, I have decided to revive this blog.

For far too long, the deadly combination of neo-puritanism and sheer inanity which dominates Manx life has gone without comment.

Time to correct that, I think.

For example, I nipped into the supermarket yesterday to buy a single item, which took me less than one minute to find and should have taken at most two to buy via the ’10 or less items’ till.

It actually took 20. This was because I got stuck in two successive queues of lottery and scratch card losers.

The first basket queue was stopped dead by some cabbage with a list of lucky lotto numbers, so the manager stepped in and directed us over to the dedicated fag and lottery tickets queue, where we found another cabbage working her way through orders for about a dozen such cards for other inhabitants of her allotment.

In desperation, most of us gave up and went back to the basket queue, where all the other lottery losers were still insisting on being served instead of going to the fag queue. Most of them seemed to know the cashier, who was happily enquiring about their families in between tapping in about one more number a minute instead of directing the whole bunch over to the till actually set up to handle their sad fetish.

As a devout idler and Bernardist, persistent gamblers certainly do not annoy me, just as down-on-their-luck buyers of supermarket booze and fags never annoy me. Neither do folk who line up and spend £1 on a random Lotto ticket for fun. More power to all their elbows.

No, what ires me is the complete lack of self-respect shown by being in a public place spending half an hour and your benefits on trash you pretend is a calculated punt.

Don’t make me laugh. Real gamblers risk their house on a horse, or play Russian roulette.

I have worked with the long term mentally ill, and they have considerably more dignity than scratch card purchasers who, like investment fund managers, their finance sector kissing cousins, take up space on the planet which sentient beings could make far better use of.

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